I like...and I eagerly await the nexy update...

Another very satisfying, gap-filling-in, and character-developing chapter!

good

Well, I liked the original version just fine, but then I'm quite familiar with both shows. At the moment you've toned down the arrogance on the part of the SGA team and Rodney quite nicely. I think it was a good decision to weave in the Hoffan events as an example of the pitfalls of zealous science. I'll be interested to see how you get Tara to Atlantis this time.

Events are flowing well thus far.

It starts out much better than the original story. At least you explain how she got to that galaxy, and how come she doesn't really recognise some of the SGA gang as being from Earth.

One nitpick - why would she use the term "DNA"? And if she did, wouldn't the SGA crew pick up on it as an Earth term?

Another very good chapter! I say again, your re-write is even better than the original and fills in some of the gaps in motivation or details that you didn't have time for in the previous version.

Nice work (both from you and your beta)!

I wanted to work on fleshing out both the story and the characterization and I'm glad that it's noticed. Thank you!

I must admit, the re-write of "Come To Dust" is much better. The writing has improved, and it is much more coherent and concise. Good job!

That was another thing I wanted to improve on... the other story wasn't exactly the most coherent and, if one wasn't exactly well-versed, one could get lost. It's a mistake I'm working to rectify, for sure. Thank you for reviewing!

I enjoyed the first version, but this is a vast improvement.

Good job.

I'm actually glad to know that it can be seen as an improvement after exactly two chapters... music to this little writer's ears, for sure. Thanks. :)

i like all the little things you've added to this from the original. well done

Why, thank you.

This is coming along very nicely. I liked the original version of the story that you posted, but you have done very well with this re-write and it has definitely improved. I think the pace is a lot better and there is a high level of care with detail and characterizations that makes this a really good read, I'm looking forward to reading more.

That was the one thing that I was a bit touched about, especially with some of the old story's reviews, was characterizations. It really is hard to write a character you really don't know much about. It is something I hoped to improve on and I'm glad I'm sort of going in the right direction.

cool

Thanks!

It's really good so far! Is she really going to never remember her time in Sunnydale!?! Please say it isn't so!!!!!

In the original story, she remembered bits and pieces, especially when the whale storyline of Season 3 (of Atlantis) picked up. I'm thinking she'll remember more, but it'll be mixed in with fragments of her memories in Pegasus, visions of the past on Atlantis and visions of things to come. She will remember, even if she feels she doesn't want to.

Excellent! Yes, this is a really helpful way to answer so many of the questions raised in the first version of your story.

Plus, having Tara visited by the Angel of Death beforehand actually makes SO much more sense of her "Can we just skip it?" conversation with Willow (which never quite rang true to me -- I thought Tara was wise enough to do the slow re-building work by then, but if she KNEW this was all the time she'd have with her lover, then YES, of COURSE skip to the already-made-up-now-let's-make-love parts of the program)!

Beautifully done, and I can't wait to read the rest.

Would you believe that this was never my intention? I just chose to rewrite the story one night and the first chapter wrote itself. I think I like it far better than what was originally planned!

As much as I love Tara/Willow, it did make little sense to just throw them back together, especially since the writers knew that they were killing her off. It seems to make more sense that she was pressured into it, knowing she only had a few days left and this was her utopian way to spend them.

I enjoyed the way you worked the Angel of Death scene into Tara and Willow's reconciliation, Although i think you mean to say the Angel of Death looked at her with pathos rather than tragedy. I didn't see anything wrong with the first version of the story, sorry i haven't reviewed before now, but I'm open to a new direction. Which character was it you felt was going OOC? I thought Tara was very true to the show, but I've only seen a few episodes of Atlantis so I wouldn't really be able to tell.

I felt that the Angel was the only way to break through to Tara... using an Ancient would not have worked as neatly, I think. As for the pathos, rather than tragedy, you may be right. And this story is going in a different direction. It's focusing more on Tara than the SG team's willingness to use her. And I felt that I was losing Tara's Buffyverse character-ness. I didn't want to make her OOC, so I chose to add a few elements of what makes Tara, Tara. That's all. Thanks for reviewing!

Interesting that you chose to rewrite this story. The opening chapter at least now answers the question "How did I get here?". I still like the concept of this story and will read this version when the remainder is posted.

Well, I thank you for reading the second edition of this story. I just felt the story was lacking and it was starting to lack the more I kept writing it. This new version may answer 'how did I get here?' but it also leaves out 'what do I do now?'.