Girl Talk

Joe's Note: And for the person who wanted to see Padmé…

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     "The Banking Clan has hidden huge factories on Muunilist, building huge droid armies and massive warships. We must act quickly."

     Oh yes, we simply must. Cordelia rolled her eyes from her spot safely behind Masters Kenobi and Yoda. Maybe if she painted herself blue, she could figure out a way to switch places with Aayla. Even running around in a skimpy leather outfit and getting shot at by robots had to be better than politics. Especially since she never got to actually do anything other than stand behind Yoda and look… were Jedi supposed to look pretty? She didn't look intimidating, that was for sure. So why was she even here?

     "I agree." Behind his desk, Chancellor Clinton… err, Palpatine was drumming his fingertips together. It took all of Cordelia's self-control not to ask the creepy old bastard if he could hiss 'Excellent', like Mr. Burns. "But who to send? Master Windu still fights on Dantooine."

     Yoda pondered that for only a moment before looking over at Obi-Wan. "Lead the assault, Master Obi-Wan can." Gee, considering Obi-Wan had brought the intelligence to the Council and was brought to the meeting to present things to the Chancellor? Wow, she never saw that one coming.

     Nodding, Obi-Wan gestured to the window behind Palpatine's desk. "My army is ready, Chancellor. We can leave immediately."

     "Yes… and young Skywalker as well." Palpatine rose from his seat and walked over to where Obi-Wan's padawan was standing in the corner. This was where he belonged, in Cordelia's opinion: out of the way, and neither seen nor heard. "I suggest that we give him special command of your space forces. His exceptional skill will be quite useful."

     Another one where she knew how it was going to end, no visions or Jedi powers required. Obi-Wan would keep babying Emokin, which was why he was so damn emo in the first place, Yoda would side with Obi-Wan, and then the Chancellor would tell them both where to stick it and override their decision.

     Yawn. Cordelia looked down at her nails. Maybe when she got back, she could make another attempt at teaching Ashla how to give a proper manicure. After all, younglings had to be good for something…

     "…then it is decided." Obi-Wan and Yoda flopped back into their chairs and exchanged looks. Cordelia bit her lip to avoid snickering. De-nied.

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     "So… forbidden love with a Jedi. How's that working out for you?"

     Padmé Amidala whirled around at the strange voice inside her apartment, cursing herself for her complacency. She'd almost been killed twice before her trip to Geonosis, and who knew how hard the Confederacy would be trying to kill her now that the war was actually in full swing? Her hand dropped to her leg, feeling the blaster that was strapped to her thigh under the long gown she was wearing. "Who's there?" After all, while being unladylike was preferable to being dead, she had no desire to expose herself just to pull a blaster on someone who wasn't there to harm her.

     Her question was ignored. "Hmm. Love what you're doing with the flowers around the great skyline view… it really helps break up the whole 'I'm living on a planet that's all city' monotony while bringing in some natural light… but seriously? Who does your hair?" A woman melted out of the shadows, shuddering as she ran one hand through her own brown locks. "The human head is not supposed to look that wide. It's freaky."

     It took a moment for Padmé to run through the list of possible people who could gain access to her apartment, and she quickly narrowed it down to the rotating Jedi protectors that still guarded her even after Anakin's assignment had ended. That was backed up by the black and gold lightsaber hanging from the woman's belt. But it was the woman's outfit, a blue gown similar to one Padmé herself owned and an ornate silver belt to which the lightsaber was clipped, that allowed her to identify the intruder. "Cordelia Chase, I presume?"

     "Aww, has Anakin been talking about me with his secret girlfriend? I'm touched!" Cordelia took a few steps closer, gesturing to the window behind Padmé. "So, he's off to battle and save the Republic… and you get to stay home, watch the droids, and play dress up. That's gotta sting."

     Padmé opened her mouth to snap at the younger woman, and then stopped herself. As annoying as Cordelia was, the Jedi evidently knew what she and Anakin had thought was a closely guarded secret… a secret that could destroy them both. Therefore, the situation would have to be handled carefully. "I'm not sure what you think you know about Anakin and myself, but I assure you it's not true. And seeing as how I would rather not see any battles waged at all, my place is here to continue trying to work for a peaceful end to this conflict."

     Shrugging, Cordelia slipped past Padmé to stare out the window at the same thing Padmé herself had been watching, the departure of one of the Republic's many fleets of clone troopers. "Well, you two aren't exactly janitors' closets and such, but you aren't the first couple in history to be hiding from your friends. Been there, done that, got rebar through the stomach. But hey, if you're sure you don't want someone to talk to about it… I'll go find my girlfriend and you can hang out with Goldenrod and the trashcan with wheels."

     "So you've broken into my apartment…"

     "I didn't really have to break in. I just told that piratey-looking security guy of yours that I was one of the Jedi and he let me in."

     "…and revealed that you know a secret that can destroy my life because you want to talk?" Padmé frowned. She'd have to speak to Captain Typho about properly identifying her visitors in the future, before she ended up with someone more dangerous that a chatty girl. "Why?"

     That just got Padmé another shrug. "You've met the Jedi, right?" Cordelia gestured down at herself. "Do I look like a typical Jedi? Do I ACT like a typical Jedi? I'm bored, Padmé. Hiskari is good company, but there's only so much one person can do. Nobody to talk about hair, or clothes, or all kinds of stupid little stuff with. Most of them haven't had a normal conversation with a regular person in their entire life. You know what it's like to try and balance love for a Jedi with a normal life. So I decided to come visit you."

     Padmé just blinked. "And so if I don't want to be friends with you and talk about all sorts of girlish things that, might I add, I skipped out on when I started walking the path to where I am now? What happens to my secret then? Or is this just a very friendly introduction to a blackmail situation?"

     "Blackmail you?" Cordelia tipped her head to the side. "Only if you want me to. I mean, I know some people get off on that loss of power thing and… well, you're a commanding senator-slash-teenage queen. It's not really my bag, but if that's your thing… I guess I could."

     "You're odd, you know that right?" Padmé sighed and rubbed her temples. Would it really be so bad to humor this strange woman, if it kept her secret safe? And maybe she'd finally be able to get her handmaidens to back off a bit on fashion suggestions if she started taking more of an interest in her own appearance.

     "This from the girl with a two-foot wide head."

     Hmm. Perhaps it would.