NOTE: This chapter is rated FR15

Good Tidings We Bring

Title: All Wrapped Up . . .

Series: Good Tidings We Bring

Author: Eena_Angel2001

Rating: R, for language

Category: HP/AtS

Disclaimer: I don't own own any of these characters. They belong to JK Rowling and Joss Whedon respectively.

Spoilers: S4 for AtS, OotP-ish for HP

Summary: #214 on the Fic For All

Notes: It's not a romantic pairing, but it was the only way I could think of getting these two together for a ficlet. I hope you enjoy.

~*~

"I will have you killed for this, you Muggle bitch!"

She rolled her eyes in exasperation. "You Death Eaters," she mumbled almost to herself. "Can't you at least think of some creative insults every now and then? Even Gidget knew how to make our verbal spars a little interesting."

"I demand to be released this instant!" the man seated across from her roared. "Or-"

"Or what?" she interrupted with an unimpressed sort. "I'll suffer your wrath? I hate to break it to you, but your wrath isn't looking all that wrathful at the moment. Especially since you're currently chained to that chair."

"Muggle filth-"

"Bitch, whore, harlot, blah, blah, blah," She waved his insults away dismissively. "Now, we can sit here and exchange insults all day long, but personally, I've got better things to do on Christmas Eve. And I'm certain a dark overlord such as yourself also had his own plans for the holidays, so why don't we just get down to business and discuss the reason why the Senior Partners summoned you here today?"

"Your dirty Muggle magicians and their paltry concerns are no matter to me," was the disdainful reply.

"All right then, I see you're not in the most cooperative mood right now, so how about I do most of the talking and you just listen?"

"You will pay dearly for these transgressions-"

"And if you don't stop with the empty death threats, I'm going to let Gavin here behead you," she interjected, a note of irritation entering her voice at last. The mask of the cool, detached lawyer disappeared for a second as a dangerous gleam entered her eyes. Her colleague shifted slightly at the change in her demeanour, hefting his axe just a bit higher for the bound wizard to see. The wizard sneered at the man, but decided to be quiet for time being.

The gleam left her eyes after a minute of silence and she titled her lips upwards in a satisfied half smile. "Good, now let's get down to the matter at hand. Mr. Voldemort, it has recently come to the attention of the Senior Partners that you have certain designs for the Wizarding world, and for the Muggle world as well. Now, while your plans for domination over the wizard race actually interest the Senior Partners, there is the matter of your plans for 'purging' the Muggle world. You obviously see Muggles as creatures inferior to yourself, and you are entitled to your opinion, but I'm afraid we cannot let you carry out your plans for the subjugation of the Muggle world."

"You bring me here to plead for the fate of your pathetic existence?" he asked scornfully.

"No, not really," she replied smoothly. "It is just the Senior Partners have plans of their own for the Muggle world, and your plans don't really mesh with theirs. Now, they don't really care what you have in store for the Wizarding world. In all honesty, we don't give a shit about what happens among you wand-wielding weirdos, but we have to draw the line at your plans for total world domination. The Muggle world is far too important in terms of profits and expansion for us to allow you to just run amok in it."

"You don't have the power to stop me-"

"And yet we have the power to chain you to that chair," she snapped irritably. "Mr. Voldemort, we here at Wolfram and Hart don't actually mind evil plots. In fact, we manage and organize quite a few for many of our clients. You could even say that it's our specialty. And in exchange for your compliance in confining your war within the boundaries of the Wizarding world, the Senior Partners are willing to help you with your other ventures. And more importantly, the Senior Partners are interested in helping you defeat this Order of the Phoenix organization that has been causing you so much problems."

The wizard looked at her with some shock. "How can they do that?"

She smiled at him with false warmth. "Why, by killing Albus Dumbledore, of course."

He narrowed his eyes at her suspiciously. "Could they actually do that?"

"They brought you here, didn't they?" she asked with a smirk. "The Senior Partners are not in the business of promising things beyond their ability to do. If they say they can kill Dumbledore for you, then they can do it. In fact, I have a proposal ready for you to look over. It outlines some of the possible ways in which we could go about in bringing about Mr. Dumbledore's demise. You're quite welcome to take it home and ponder over it. All we ask is that you seriously consider entering into a business relationship with us. The Senior Partners don't really want to eliminate you, but if you continue to persist in your plans for the destruction of the Muggle world, they won't think twice about it."

He took the offered filed hesitantly, his eyes flickering with something like glee as he skimmed over the contents. "You certainly do present a convincing case," he murmured.

"I'm a lawyer, Mr. Voldemort, it's what I do," she reminded him. "Now, what is your answer? Can I tell my superiors that you interested in pursuing this prospect further?"

A cruel smile twisted the snake-like face of the wizard before her. "You may tell them that I am very interested in what they have to offer, just as long as it is clear that the Wizarding world is my domain, and none other's."

"It's perfectly clear," she assured him. "But of course, we'll get down to the nitty-gritty of it later on. Gavin here will be happy to escort you to my secretary in order to arrange a luncheon meeting sometime in the future. Just let her know what day is good for you, and she'll do the rest. And you can pick up your wand from security on the way out, but I would advise you against trying anything. This building and the people that work in it aren't like normal Muggles. You will most likely be killed before security lets you fire off a curse in this building."

The chains binding Voldemort snapped off just as she finished talking. The wizard got to his feet slowly, his face contemplative as he looked at her. "For a mere Muggle, you certainly are an impressive creature, Miss . . . ?"

"Call me Lilah," she told him. "And coming from you, I am sure that was meant as a compliment. It's been interesting, Mr. Voldemort. Have a nice holiday and I'll see you after the New Year."

She continued to smile and wave amicably at the wizard as Gavin escorted him from the room. As soon as the door shut behind them, the smile left her face and was replaced with a scowl. "Stupid wizards, they're always more trouble than they're worth. You think we would have learned that after that debacle with Grinewald."

She shook her head and rose from her seat. Her eyes went to her office window and the city lights stretching out towards the horizon. It was late, but not that late. As she told Mr. Voldemort before, she did have better things to be doing on Christmas Eve, a rugged Englishman being at the top of that list.

Lilah smiled wickedly and quickly gathered up her briefcase and keys before heading for the door. She could always assign Gavin to do the remaining work on creating the Voldemort file. It wasn't like he had anything better to do, or more accurately, it wasn't like she cared if he did. With almost a skip in her step, Lilah made her way to her car and headed immediately in the direction of Wesley's apartment.

A new client and a week's vacation to spend rolling around in Wesley's bed. The holidays really couldn't get any better than that.

~*~