Disclaimer: They’re still not mine.

Man of Steel, Boy of Kleenex

Superman turned his x-ray vision toward the sound of a fight, looking for the source. He saw two men in the back of a small costume shop. A standing man delivered a vicious kick to the ribs of one lying on the floor. Superman rose into the air, and accelerated toward them.

“Janus,” said the man on the floor. “Break the statue!”

The standing man picked up a two faced statue, raised it over his head, and smashed it down onto the floor.

“Oh crap!” said Xander, just before he ploughed into the ground at five hundred miles an hour.